Here’s a video of writer Jonathan Franzen on why Poets & Writers magazine is good.
It is excellent. And they’re celebrating their 40th anniversary, which is why they’re posting little videos of famous writers.
And why not? Cheers.
Author Archives: Kyle Kimberlin
Deck the Halls!
I haven’t had much too blog about the last several days. I’ve started a few posts, and lost interest. The drafts are mulling like cider in the back of my mind. But don’t wait up.
As a consolation, here’s a great little video to watch. It’ll warm your punch, is my point.
Speakers on!
OCD Titles
Here is an image from an advertising e-mail I got today. Sometimes I wonder about things like this.
What jumped out at me wasn't that the snacks looked good, which they don't. Or that I was drawn to the magazine cover's passive-aggressive minimalism. It was the number 27.
It's as if the editor said, We're gonna write an article about ways to snack, and when it's done we're gonna count the number of ways we wrote about it. Snaking, I mean. …Um … That will be our title. We'll put it on the cover!
And there was much rejoicing.
Why? Why does the reader care how many ways there are in the article? The title should be "Snack Smarter!" or "Tips for Smarter Snaking," or "Snack Smarter or Die." Ooo, what about, "Smarter Snacking for Better Sex"?
We see titles like his all the time.
9 Tips for defunking your hard drive
4 ways to shine shoes without getting out of bed
16 reasons not to play with fire I can understand something like The Top 10 Ugliest Cars for 2011, or The 100 Worst US Senators. The number actually adds some meaning, or context. But I say it's time to cut back on this obsession with counting things. It's not useful information, it's it's superfluous and redundant and it uses more words without meaning anything different. Or something. Of course, sometimes it's good to say way too much about nothing in particular. Because if you're reading a blog post like this, you're not reading the news. So I'm doing a public service. You're welcome. … I got some apples today, so I'm outta here. Time for a snack.
What jumped out at me wasn't that the snacks looked good, which they don't. Or that I was drawn to the magazine cover's passive-aggressive minimalism. It was the number 27.
It's as if the editor said, We're gonna write an article about ways to snack, and when it's done we're gonna count the number of ways we wrote about it. Snaking, I mean. …Um … That will be our title. We'll put it on the cover!
And there was much rejoicing.
Why? Why does the reader care how many ways there are in the article? The title should be "Snack Smarter!" or "Tips for Smarter Snaking," or "Snack Smarter or Die." Ooo, what about, "Smarter Snacking for Better Sex"?
We see titles like his all the time.
9 Tips for defunking your hard drive4 ways to shine shoes without getting out of bed
16 reasons not to play with fire I can understand something like The Top 10 Ugliest Cars for 2011, or The 100 Worst US Senators. The number actually adds some meaning, or context. But I say it's time to cut back on this obsession with counting things. It's not useful information, it's it's superfluous and redundant and it uses more words without meaning anything different. Or something. Of course, sometimes it's good to say way too much about nothing in particular. Because if you're reading a blog post like this, you're not reading the news. So I'm doing a public service. You're welcome. … I got some apples today, so I'm outta here. Time for a snack.
How To Publish By Christmas
December is Here
It comes driving darkness ahead of it like a slow herd of dark animals.
That’s a fuse for a poem, maybe.
But tonight it’s good that my Christmas lights are up, to keep the December beasts at bay.
Inspiration is Nonsense
So says Salmon Rushdie, and I think he has a point. Here’s a little video to watch, is my point.
December Comes
Only an hour now remains of November. No fault of mine. I certainly didn’t hurry it along.
We had ourselves quite a sunset over The Channel this evening. I got a few shots.
(Click to enlarge.)
This was taken from the yard in front of my place, looking WSW. Near the bottom, left of center, you can see the great frigate HMS Sandflea. She’s sailing out in search of the illusive red-eyed abalone, for the finer restaurants of Santa Barbara. You know, cloth napkins, and all the iced tea you can drink.
After a few minutes, the clouds reddened and the massive ship had disappeared. Farewell, boys, and Godspeed. Be back by Friday, before the tourists roll in.
"Come, come thou bleak December wind,
And blow the dry leaves from the tree!
Flash, like a Love-thought, thro’me, Death
And take a Life that wearies me."- Samuel Taylor Coleridge
Boy, old Sam was the life of the party, wasn’t he? He wrote under the influence of opiates, they say.
“Some of us go singing
happily into death or into
afternoons with children
naming the shapes of clouds
that lead the shadows of force
off the sea. There is tea
in the evening and the windows
shine the inner spaces back to us.”— Me, under the influence of nothing much at all.
Here’s to November, anyway.
Docs Rat
I love Google Docs. It’s a nice little free word processor, built right in to my web browser and my Google account. I know some of you writers use it. You can create simply–formatted documents. Not just text documents, but spreadsheets, presentations, forms, and drawings. And if you want to, you can export to Word, Excel, Powerpoint, etc., for further work. You can even create a PDF directly from Google Docs.
Now I’ve spotted a new feature, drag and drop uploading of documents. Instead of clicking Browse to upload a document and navigating to the correct folder and file, I can click Upload, then drag-drop the document file over a magical spot. Presto, it uploads. It looks like this (click to enlarge).
Take note of the conversion options, and be sure to check them. Otherwise, you’re just storing a copy of your original file – in its original format, such as Word. That takes up space in your Google Docs account, and you can’t edit the file as a Google Doc. I guess some people use this as backup storage, but I’m interested in actual editing + storage. I have several hundred documents there, but I’m using 0% of my storage. That’s because if it’s in Google Doc format, it doesn’t count against your 1GB storage limit.
Don’t bother selecting a Destination folder at this point. That feature simply doesn’t work. Bummer. Instead, once you get back to your Google Docs main list, drag your new document into the appropriate folder.
Incidentally, if you don’t see the Drag and drop area, it might be because you’re using an older browser or something. I’m using Firefox 3.6.12 and Google Chrome 7.0.517.44. I have not tried Internet Exploder, because I don’t use that. But in any case, the traditional Select File to Upload link is still there for you.
Bonus Lyrics
Old man down, way down down,
down by the docks of the city.
Blind and dirty, asked me for a dime,
a dime for a cup of coffee.
I got no dime, but I got some time to hear his story
[der link]
New Poems Page
The blog has a new page about my poems. Click the Poems button on the navigation bar above.
Unless you’re reading Metaphor in your e-mail. In that case, click here first, then do it.
Pondering Heaven
(Briefly)
Check out this comic (click to enlarge) …
Which set me to pondering:
If we plan go to Heaven, and we subscribe – as I do – to the hope that we will find our departed and much loved pets there … Are there puppies poopin’ on the pearly passageways? And if so, who cleans up the poop?
Sure sure, it’s easy to say that spirits don’t eat and excrete in yon Spiritual Realms; that we are, hereafter, purely consciousness, not corporeal. But it’s just as easy to envision an Afterlife in which I’m wielding a silver pooper scooper for all eternity. If so, is that heaven, or some other place?
What’s Your Motto?
Progress Not Perfection
I finished Draft 7 of the novel and started Draft 8. There was no party, no press release. Poets & Writers Magazine sent no one for an interview. Maybe I was expecting too much, too soon?
That was a few days ago, and now I’ve finished the rewrite of Chapter 1. It’s better. You’ll have to take my word.
Some big decisions were needful in tackling another pass. (Oh look, a glaring non sequitur!)
Draft 8 will be an actual rewrite, not yet, still, again, another pass through the computer files pecking at them like a chicken. In other words, I’m writing the whole thing over, using what I’ve already written for reference, but creating – typing – new files. There’s just no other way to tap into fresh creativity, leave out the crap, and make it better than it is.
The emphasis will be on scenes, not plot. I need to be relieved of the mechanics of plot. It’s making my writing dry. Life is not continuous or perpetual, it’s fragmentary. Which is not to say there isn’t a story behind it, an arc. It’s just not the point, when it comes down to story. Thankfully, I have help for the plotting, a co-conspirator, so to speak. (Isn’t the term co-conspirator redundant?)
I can report, with surprise, that so far re-writing from scratch is quicker – more facile – than trying to schmooze mounds of existing text around. I know writing is rewriting, but sometimes it’s like trying to sculpt a suspension bridge out of marbles and dry sand.
Onward and inward!
Hope you’re enjoying the full moon tonight!
Metaphor 