Category Archives: gonzo life

words not made

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Eyes are vocal, tears have tongues,
And there are words not made with lungs.
– Richard Crashaw, poet (1613-1649)

Well, Christmas is upon us, on the New Calendar. I always like to note that December 25 on the Julian Calendar – the Orthodox liturgical calendar – falls on January 6 on the Calendar used by most Westerners and their governments. So Christmas in my Church is still 2.5 weeks away. But I digressed before I never started to have a point. … Oh yeah, Christmas.

No. I don’t know what I want to say to you about Christmas yet. Maybe tomorrow. Tonight, the topic is words. I’ll be briefer.

I want to change the quote of the day to read this way:

Eyes are vocal tears,
have tongues,
And there are words not made,
with lungs.

Anybody mind? Richard probably doesn’t. He’s dead, presumably. And I’m off to bed, to dream about words not made.

So much of what I’ve written,
I haven’t.

In honor of the Solstice, let us remember the words of The Chink:

Ha ha ho ho and hee hee.

top 10 most iritating phrases

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Compiled at Oxford.

The top ten most irritating phrases:

1 – At the end of the day

2 – Fairly unique

3 – I personally

4 – At this moment in time

5 – With all due respect

6 – Absolutely

7 – It’s a nightmare

8 – Shouldn’t of

9 – 24/7

10 – It’s not rocket science

I concur. And I could add a few more:

Whatever

Oh snap

Don’t go there

Boots on the ground

I’m like … I was all like … meaning I said, or I thought.

Alleged victim.

Oh, I could go on forever, irritating you. And you’d be all like, “Crap on a cracker, Kyle. With all due respect, I personally think at this point in time, it’s a nightmare.” And I’d be all like, “Whatever.”

wake me when it’s over

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Well I’ve got my sample ballot all filled out. I’m ready to hit the polls first thing in the morning.

I plan to vote for Senators Obama and Biden. And I’ve made my choices for school board and water district too.

I haven’t posted for a while. I had a cold for a week, and was mostly watching TV and going to bed early. Colds suck. They make you feel out of it, you know? One day last week, I was working at my desk at the office, and I suddenly had this thought:

Hey, which shoes did I put on this morning? Am I wearing the oxfords, the runners, or one of each? Should I look?

That’s the kind of thinking that leaves no doubt that a guy ought to be getting more sleep, drinking more water, and taking his vitamins.

I hope you all enjoy Election Day. Get out and vote. Unless you’re a poor little moron with an itch to vote for the warmonger and the wolf hunter. Then please please stay home. We’ve had enough of that crap.

one two punch, but don’t drink the kool-aid

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I’m reading my e-mail for the day. The last two I opened were:

From Fidelity, telling me the money markets my IRA is in will be participating in a guarantee program.

From Amazon.com, offering me cool deals on a new Blackberry and accessories.

Am I alone in seeing a juxtaposition bordering on the absurd?

Am I alone in feeling a tad queasy?

Am I alone?

John McCain’s Baby Bunny BBQ

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I guess I should post something on the blog, because I’m getting all these e-mails asking if I’m alright. “Kyle,” they say, “where are you? We miss your posts! Write something clever for us.”

OK, I missed about 10 days and in truth nobody noticed. So it goes. I’m just being a little facetious. Or sarcastic.

What’s the difference between facetious and sarcastic? Anybody know?

Anyone?

Bueller?

Which leads me to wonder if Ferris is a real first name. By real, I mean one ever given to a real person, rather than just to fictional Ferris in the movie.

Turns out it is a real name, though rare. And did you know that the poet Galway Kinnell has a son named Fergus? They’re both Irish names.

I’m a poet. a creative writer, and a technical writer. The latter is why I haven’t been blogging. See, the economy sucked the life out of the freelance writing & editing gig I had, working from home. So I’m grateful to have a new one, which started on Monday 9.8. I like it very much. The people are nice, and the technology is interesting.

My days this week were fully occupied, while evenings were lent to the bio-feedback essential to acclamation to a new situation; in other words, more rest.

I’m still technically freelance, a consultant, but it’s full time, on site, long term. Now I can pay the bills, which is nice. Southern California Edison won’t cast me into outer darkness. Cox Cable and Verizon won’t strip me off all connection to other sentient life.

You are all sentient, aren’t you? Self-aware? Infected by consciousness and the consciousness of consciousness? (That’s Wallace Stegner.) Sure, just like me. Let’s let each other know how that works out, alright? In the words of Garrison Keillor, Be well, do good work, and keep in touch.

roll this over, dudes

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I thought y’all might get a giggle out of this little email I sent to my investment company today.

I received your undated snailmail letter, urging me to combine all my 401Ks with my Fidelity IRA. I have two questions.
1. Do I have any 401Ks which are not so combined?
2. Is there a way to get Fidelity to completely stop sending me snail mail? I’m already getting my statement online, but you good people just can’t seem to wean yourselves, finally, from using chemical dies to imprint information on sheets of cellulose and then sending the resulting recyclables to my home. Cheesewhiz! I mean, it’s 2008 already.

Thank you. :o)

Anybody with me out there? Can I get an Amen or something?

quirks

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Pouring myself through the tubes of the internets, I noticed that some bloggers are following a meme in which they post several quirky things about themselves. [For example.]

Quirks are interesting. Everybody has them; some of us have lots, and are called quirky. Of course, some of us are simply nuts, but that’s beside the point.

I have some quirks. One involves checking the locks at bedtime, walking away, and being unable to remember what I learned when I checked the locks. Were they locked? Back I go, but not more than once. It’s not OCD, just HUA.

I’m not going to post several of my quirks, but I will share one more: I like to plop on my bed sometimes when I get home. I don’t get in bed, don’t undress, and I don’t lie down exactly; I just plop, or flop. Occasionally, I flounder just a bit. I walk up to the end of the bed, and fall face first. Then I like there a minute or two, get up, and go about my business. It’s not a nap and not much rest, but it seems to center me.

This quirk undoubtedly dates to my childhood. I think I did it in high school, and I’m sure I used to do it in college.

I can’t explain it, and I only do it a few times a month so I don’t get many opportunities to examine the act. Besides, critical inquiry would certainly ruin the experience. But I will say that it feels good to reacquaint myself with the horizontal axis of the corporeal world, in the midst of my ill considered, myopic striving for the Divine.

So what kind of quirky stuff do you do?

blog days of summer

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Well I haven’t been blogging much lately, have I? I’m in the blog days, so called because of the fact they don’t admit of blogability. It’s a paradox. Such days bespeak a life let slip deep into transition. A confluence of existential forces, in which the TV reminds us of the tragedy of chronic halitosis. And ooh, there’s a scuba diving cat, steeped in Wagnerian strains, no more submerged in mutability than me. My life is changing, is my point.

It’s all good. Obscurum per obscurius: the vagaries of the vague can keep us on our toes. I’ll be up for air soon. And I’m just messing with you guys. In the mean time, I’ve been working on rewriting a scene in my novel, in which the two brothers witness the accidental electrocution of their father’s handyman. The previous drafts had a more juvinile voice, much closer to the cognition of protagonist Marty’s eleven years of age. Now that the voice I’m reaching for is more an adult remembering the event, the scene needs to be more sophisticated, and compassionate.

Anyhoo, here’s a cool video of Al Gore’s challenge to the nation on eliminating carbon generated electricity. If he’d been inaugurated after we was elected, we’d all be far far better off.

leisure?

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The only thing one can give an artist is leisure in which to work. To give an artist leisure is actually to take part in his creation.

-Ezra Pound, poet (1885-1972)

Now in my case that’s just ironic to the point of being … well… disturbing.

three questions

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Well it is an historic night. Obama has presumptively cinched the nomination. The first viable black nominee for president. That pretty much rocks. I watched his speech, which was great. And I got an e-mail from Hillary, which was kinda sad. She’s still a close second in my estimations.

All of which leaves me with three compelling socio-political questions:

  • Why is it that, in a can of fruit cocktail, the pears are always on top and the peaches are on the bottom? Check it out. I’m not lyin’.

  • Why is it that, when you bite the inside of your lip, you keep biting it again and again in the same place?

  • Why is it that, even though the TV season was delayed for months by the writer’s strike, we’re already watching phreekin reruns?

Get back to me on these, wooodja?

category me

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Finally, Kyle is among the names given to tropical cyclones in the Atlantic. I have waited so many years for this, and the fact that the names were announced – or at least the news reached me – on my birthday yesterday makes it oh so much sweeter.

When I was a kid, I was one of maybe 5 guys named Kyle in the U.S., including the famous soccer player Kyle Rote. Now it’s a very popular name. It’s gotten to the point that if I’m in a store and hear a woman yell something like, “Kyle get over here. Put that down! No you can’t have a toy,” I barely look around.

So many times, we have been passed up by less popular names like Hugo. Now at last we have a shot at the title! We can be somebody – a contender. A Kyle could be a Category 5!

I’m so excited. And I’ll be watching the eastern Atlantic as the summer bears on. The way travel costs are going, this may be the only way a Kyle ever gets a Caribbean vacation.