I have a dog so I was buying a large bag of Purina at Wal-Mart and was in line to check out.
A woman behind me asked if I had a dog.
A woman behind me asked if I had a dog.
“No,” I said. “I’m starting The Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn’t because I ended up in the hospital last time. But I lost 50 pounds before I woke up in intensive care with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.”
I told her that it’s essentially a perfect diet . “You just load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete, so I’m going to try it again.”
Practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story. Horrified, the woman asked if I’d ended up in the hospital in that condition because I had been poisoned.
I told her that it’s essentially a perfect diet . “You just load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete, so I’m going to try it again.”
Practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story. Horrified, the woman asked if I’d ended up in the hospital in that condition because I had been poisoned.
“No,” I said, “I was sitting in the street, licking my balls, and a car hit me.”
Metaphor 