So yesterday morning I was just hanging out on the planet, not bothering anybody, when I got a phone call from a lady in Virginia. She said she represented Lyndon LaRouche, former democratic candidate for president, that from Virginia she could smell roasting lame duck, and that we need to seize the assets of General Motors as it circles the drain.

Of course, I made all the appropriate noises connoting comprehension, but the truth is that I’ve had other things on my mind that the seaworthiness of GM. I knew that American automakers are in the doldrums, but I had no idea how bad. Frankly, reading the financial news lately is even more depressing than the runaway bride and the farking Jackson trial.

So after talking to this lady — who has worked for LaRouche since 1971 — I went to the computer and checked it out. Ay carumba. How the heck did they let GM get in debt to the tune of 10 times it’s market cap? Boneheads.

It gets even more entertaining last night, when along comes Kirk Kerkorian with a bid to increase his GM holdings to 9%, then today’s S&P downgrades of GM and Ford’s credit ratings to junk.

It’s all a little weird to be coincidence, don’t you think? This lady just happens to call me about LaRouche’s opinion about GM, hours before the news breaks about Kerkorian, and a day before the downgrades. Is somebody trying to tell me I should’ve bought an American truck? If so, I’ll ask the cosmos to kindly leave me out of this.