This guy has exactly the right attitude.
Thanks Joseph!
Category Archives: stories
warship museum stuck in the mud
This has got to be a metaphor for something:
NEW YORK – The USS Intrepid, the aircraft carrier that survived World War II bomb and kamikaze attacks, got stuck in the mud in the Hudson River on Monday as tugboats tried to pull it from its berth.
a long walk home
Today is the birthday of the writer Charles Frazier. He was born in North Carolina in 1950. He wrote Cold Mountain, one of the most rich and beautiful books I’ve read. And I have read quite a lot of books, and all of them slowly and carefully. Frazier’s desire to write – generally – was born out his sense of loss of North Carolinian culture and environment. The arc of his story was born in family history. In any case, it’s a fine book, and I have read it – slowly and carefully – three times. He used all the right words, in the right order.
writers needed
i’m back i think
I took an unscheduled break for a few days there. I really hope I don’t need another break like that.
Everything was going along fine until late Tuesday night. I had been out for a walk through the neighborhood whilst the trickers were treating – or whatever – and all the kids seemed to be having a good time. Stopped to chat with our security guard a couple of blocks over. Watched some tube, went to bed about the witching hour. And along about two o’clock … See, I’ve been having these attacks of upper abdominal pain at night. Usually, it lasts 2 or 3 hours and subsides, but this one lasted all night, past dawn. Really bad.
I wound up at the Urgent Care in the early morning – my Dad took me. Thanks Dad! They got me in a treatment room immediately and I was in there for 2 hours. The did an EKG, which was normal, and xrays – also OK. So having ruled out heart attack and intestinal blockage, they’re thinking gallbladder. I have to get an ultrasound on Monday.
But anyway, I’m feeling alright now. Whatever it is doesn’t bother me much in the mornings. And it is a beautiful Saturday morning. Soft light on the dusty window blinds. Just outside, seagulls are making psychotic noises. And the garbage truck is coming up the alley, spewing diesel and tossing dumpsters around like legos. Ah, autumn.
the fish rots from the head
A loyal reader responds to this previous post, asking if anyone in the line of presidential succession could forego a trip to The Wizard for a heart, a brain, or some courage. Presupposing that absolutely all of them have earned a balloon trip back to Auntie Em’s house, let’s take a look …
Sure. Secretary of Transportation. It’s vacant. Perfect.
To borrow the Rumsfeldian style, do we need a president of the US? No. Would we miss having a Decider, an ultimate place for accountability to stop? Yes. But is the office superfluous and gorged on its own self-aggrandizement? Absofrigginlutely.
The presidency was never supposed to be what it is: a megalomonarchy. He’s supposed to be the head of one of 3 separate branches of government. Just the most well-housed wheel in the machine. But Bush is acting like a King, and getting away with it because over the years the government has slowly imploded into its own bloated digestive tract.
George Washington wasn’t sworn in until April 30 1789, and until then the country hummed along without his ass. We have a legislature and courts, and departments for all sorts of public functions.
Congress has the power to enact laws, not the president. The courts are empowered to enforce the laws, not the president. Congress has the power to declare war, not the president. In fact, the president is empowered to do just about nothing at all that George W. Bush has had his sticky fingers in.
If We the People decided, in 2008, simply to decline – thank you very much – to elect a president at all, I think the rest of the free world cheer in exalting joy and relief. They would line up to hug us and feed us Belgian Waffles and gooey French cheese and stuff. We would be greeted as liberators! Especially if, at the same time, we managed to elect a representative government that was expected to work five days a week like the rest of us.
demise of the pink plastic flamingo
Pink plastic flamingo faces extinction – Yahoo! News
… the original version of the plastic flamingo may be singing its swan song after inspiring countless pranks — and being alternately celebrated as a tribute to one of nature’s most graceful creatures and derided as the epitome of American pop culture kitsch.
Union Products Inc. stopped producing flamingos and other lawn ornaments at its Leominster factory in June, and is going out of business Nov. 1 — a victim of rising expenses for plastic resin and electricity, as well financing problems.
We hardly knew ye.
Well, my folks had a pair in the back yard for a while. It’s not tacky if you have them in the back, you know.
This is hardly a canary in the coal mine folks. All the canaries have been feet-up in their besotted newspaper for a while now. Is anything Made in America anymore? Dang.
i hate cox cable
They’re fast, but they suck. So I hate them; the institution, not the employees. People gotta live. But they could do better.
I’ve been a customer for many years. I’ve had their high speed internet for about six years. About once a year, they shut off my cable for the night. It’s not a system crash or a line down; those are more frequent. It’s deliberate; they issue a work order and shut off my modem.
Actually, I get a Web page that says, in effect:
Dear Cox Customer, We turned you off. F–k you. HAHAHAHA.
It’s always at least a week after they receive the payment, which they’ve somehow screwed up. It’s always late at night, when maybe I shouldn’t care but I bloodywell do. So I always call, get tech support, and always the same frakin’ story:
Yes, they can see in the computer that they received the payment. But there was a work order, so they can’t turn it back on until customer service says so. That’s not allowed. Yes, they have managers who could do it, but they went home. Which is why they turn people off at 11pm, not 11am. So the manager’s at home eatin’ Cheetos and slappin’ his evil monkey.
Last night I asked the tech guy – Ray – what he would do in my position. Would he just get DSL? He said, “Well I guess I wouldn’t find myself in that position.” Implying that it was my fault, even though I paid the bill and he could see I did, and rules are rules.
Well here’s a new rule, Asshats: You take my money and turn me off, I’m calling the Consumer Protection Dept, the PUC, and the consumer frauds attorney at the DA’s office. Hey – there’s a Superior Ct judge in SB who used to be the consumer frauds guy, and was one of my law school professors. Think he’d remember me? Worth a shot.
Hey Cox, F–k you! HAHAHAHA
they welcome our suggestions
From: comments@whitehouse.govDate: Oct 28, 2006 10:12 AM
Subject:
To: [me] On behalf of President Bush, thank you for your correspondence.
We appreciate hearing your views and welcome your suggestions.
The President is committed to continuing our economic progress,
defending our freedom, and upholding our Nation’s deepest values.Due to the large volume of e-mail received, the White House
cannot respond to every message. Please visit the White House
website for the most up-to-date information on Presidential
initiatives, current events, and topics of interest to you.
In order to better receive comments from the public, a new system
has been implemented. In the future please send your comments to
comments@whitehouse.gov.Thank you again for taking the time to write.
Well isn’t that special. Just one thing makes it strange, and mildly ominous: I haven’t written to the White House. I figure if Bush won’t listen to US by the millions, he certainly won’t hear my still small voice. But I do have this suggestion:
Resign
You, Mr. President, and Dick Cheney with you, and Dennis Hastert for good measure. Don’t stop until the succession reaches someone who doesn’t need to make a serious visit to OZ for some vital parts.
did you miss it?
I did. I mean I knew there was some significance to the Iraq Civil War’s count of American dead this week, but I just couldn’t put my finger on it.
About what am I vaguely blathering?
The number of American military dead in Iraq now exceeds the number of people killed in the terrorist attacks on September 11, 2001.
Ponder that.
jennifer terran interview
One of my favorite musicians, Jennifer Terran, is a Santa Barbara local. But she just got home from a European tour. And here you can see and hear an interview she gave, apparently in Amsterdam. She plays two of her songs too.
The Web site is not in English, but the interview is. Just click the Video link in the right column.
Sweet
turning up the burner on the gop
“In both parties, a consensus now exists — buttressed by polls — that disaffection with a war grown costly and difficult to manage is the gravest threat to continued Republican rule.”
washingtonpost.com
This is very interesting to watch. Political power uses the Media to soften the psychological resistance of the flock. A better analogy might be a frog in a pot of hot water: If the water is hot when you through him in, he’ll jump out. Heat it gradually, and he’ll sit there and cook.
Now we’re seeing the water heated in the other direction. The frogs are getting used to the idea that the Republicans’ fear-based brainwashing – only we can protect you – we have to fight them there or fight them here – is bullshit. Time for all the froggies still in the pot to make a leap for cooler waters. Right wing reactionary mentality is optional to our survival – just as the war itself was optional – and the GOP is corrupt, so it’s safe to vote for somebody else.
Metaphor 